Last post on CaringBridge site
/ Aimee Zamora
(Wife and best friend)
March 28, 2009 ~
Three months have gone by now from the cold winter and the day of your passing and your prize Japanese maple trees are in full bloom. You would always admire them and pay close attention to watering them at this time of year so their new supple leaves would not get burnt by the warming sun. They always look so beautiful this time of year, transitioning from bare limbs to lush full branches with soft flawless leaves. We would both talk about which one’s were our favorites, yours the green one in the green pot on the deck and mine the bloodgood in the blue pot outside the kitchen window. I’ve always thought they were beautiful but you were passionate about them. Last count there are over 20 in our yard, some might say you were borderline obsessive about them (I would have to agree). Today, I study them and view them with new admiration. They make me think of you and how much I miss you. I go out and admire them every single day, and I’m sitting here viewing your favorite over the top of my screen as I type.
One of my favorite sayings is “appreciate the little things in life, for one day you will realize they were the big things.” These maples may be little things in life, but the memories like each new leaf that forms are precious. If you know me, you know that I pay close attention to all the little things. That was something Dan and I definitely had in common. He was meticulous and would notice things that most people just pass by without a second glance.
He loved his yard and would spend hours and days, making sure every little detail was perfect; power washing and staining the fence, vacuuming the muck from the bottom of the pond, sculpting the trees and bushes into perfect topiaries, and strategically and methodically planting flowers around the yard. Every little detail was tended to, nothing was missed. He would work on something, step back from every angle, view it and then work on it some more until it was exactly the way he wanted it. He was a perfectionist but if you even so much as passed Dan on the street, you would know that by looking at him.
He treated his body much the same way. Even after his diagnosis, he wanted to compete in another bodybuilding contest. Eventually, the chemo got the best of him, and he realized that wasn’t to be. But he never gave up. He would work out in the gym despite feeling sick and weak and say it made him feel better. If I had a dollar for every person who told me he didn’t look sick, and he works out harder than anyone in that gym, I’d have a closet full of Coach bags right now (ok yes I know, thanks to my generous husband, I already have that).
Dan was inspiring to everyone who knew him. One thing I will carry with me the rest of my life, is the desire to be a better person because he loved me. He always strived to do good, be a better person, and take care of those he loved no matter what. He was the PERFECT husband. He helped clean the house, he cooked, he took care of the bills, he opened the car door or any door for me always, he never left the toilet seat up, he took the garbage out, he grocery shopped, he played with his furry kids, he could fix anything, he even loved to take me shopping (every wife’s dream). He was more than my husband, he was my best friend in the world. We talked about everything and knew each other so well, we could read each other’s minds. There is absolutely NOTHING I would have changed about our marriage, I had my prince charming and life couldn’t have been better.
Then one day, July 12, 2007, our lives, our world, our universe was turned upside down. I could ask why but I would never find the answer. Only God knows why and I trust that I am where I am meant to be now. It doesn’t seem fair but I still count my blessings. I had the best and some people never experience that in their entire lifetime. I know that one day, we will be together again, and I would be lying if I didn’t admit I can’t wait for that day to come. Not that many people could say that.
Dan was like no other person I’ve met. He set high standards for himself and he also set them for others as well. He earned respect and commanded it by his actions. If you spent time with him, you were lucky. He was undeniably unforgettable. I was so honored to be his wife.
This will be the last post to CaringBridge. I wanted to extend my deepest heartfelt appreciation to those of you who supported us both through this life changing/life ending journey. I am deeply indebted to each person reading this that you opened up your hearts and offered your support. Your words of encouragement and strength lifted us up more times than you’ll ever realize. I am so grateful as was Dan, to have the most wonderful friends and family in the world!
I’ll close by saying it is my goal going forward that Dan not be forgotten. I’ve created a memorial site in his honor and welcome you all to visit so that you can celebrate his life with me.
I ask that you think of him each day and when faced with difficult situations or decisions, do what I do and ask yourself what would Dan do? There is no doubt in my mind that after doing that, you will do the right thing whatever that may be. He was an incredible, amazing, phenomenal human being, and we would all be better people if we tried to be more like Dan.
I love you forever Bobo, and I know that you will lead me on the right path wherever that may take me. I have never been more grateful for you in all my life than I am today and each day it grows more and more. May God keep you in the palm of his hand, and I’ll see you on the other side! I’m going to do everything possible to make you proud. Rest in peace my angel! Close